Friday, October 4, 2013

Mami Maestros: The Music Matriarchs of Family Gatherings

It was a regular cultural spectacle – the numerous mamis who descended into our home every few days. Each of these 'Mamis' in a manner of speaking could have been called aunt, grandmother, elder sisters or any such thing. However, mami kinda encompasses the gamut of women who bring a waft of traditional flavour with them – silk or traditional cotton sarees, diamond nose-rings and ear-rings, heavy gold chains, large red bindi, jasmine flowers, the works. If you could say anything at all, they were definitely quite a colourful lot adding flavour to our family gatherings.

The objective of these mamis, however, was in one nodal person – our own patti - grandmother. Armed with her “harmonium box” as she called it, she was quite a VIP in those parts, sitting at the lead of an army of mamis – an army it seemed to us little kids running around, playing, chattering, generally getting in the way of all those who came in.

Us grandchildren were usually warned, well in advance to behave ourselves – meaning, stay quiet, stay away, stay put. With so much of colour and clamour, however, it was a little difficult to keep us away for too long. The music gathering readied itself – seated on jamakkalams in our living room – facing patti on one side, the army of them on the other. It took a while for the clamour to settle, after which the music began. This was the interesting part. I don’t mean the actual making music as patti chased me down and made me learn these separately, so the actual purpose of the meet was not that captivating. What made it interesting was to watch each of the women as they sang.

We – the grandchildren – usually crept to the staircase that led up from the living room and sat peering through the coloured grillwork. It was a ringside view – and weren’t we rewarded! The music began and so did the various whispered comments and giggles from our end as we watched. Watched, not listened. For instance, the lady right in the front row had a reasonably thin and wobbly head. It was fascinating to see her shake and push her head in different directions, craning up as she hit a high pitch. She was the “wobbly mami”. Another was the “kannadi mami” so called because of her over-sized specs that dominated most of her face. Yet another mami was rather plump and usually out of breath. We usually waited, hoping for something dramatic while she strained and gasped through the songs. Fortunately for her, nothing of that sort happened. Rumour was that she put on this act so she could not be blamed for her out of tune voice. Children are usually the first to spread and hear such rumours.

The list of mamis was fascinating with the diamond-mami, the chungdi mami, the chuckling mami, the crying mami and so on. The list seemed endless and entertaining to us at the same time. After we became a little noisy, some adult or the other – the spoilsport – usually chased us out to play. Ya, we did have a large outdoors to play – cowshed and all.

On special occasions, the dramatics and entertainment reached a peak. Some mami or the other would start crying and the others would follow suit. Patti too would join them, wiping her eyes with the edge of her sari. We were told they cried as they were thankful to patti for teaching her the bhajans. I asked patti one day, “You teach me music also patti, so am I supposed to cry for that?” I did not understand why she found it funny. “I am nothing but a foolish old lady. All those women are making a scene for nothing. Go on with you” she would say. After stoutly defending her that she was not foolish, I would run off to play only to come back fascinated when the next batch of bhajan mamis came. Then our little group of siblings and cousins would gather at the staircase, our strong family bond aiming to predict what would happen next.

I’m quite sure patti enjoyed the classes and so did the mamis, but they would not have had as much fun and entertainment with the whole spectacle as we had, from our grandstand seat on the stairs. 

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Spell-o-Fun: A Holiday Tradition with Thatha

It was usually a holiday trademark event and a family tradition when all of us gathered around the Spell-o-Fun board, the board game, picked the coins and started building the words. The image of thatha in the midst of it all - dominant, vociferous, usually good-humoured swings into the frame. She is too small to make the words on her own, they usually said and I and the other children had an adult to "supervise" and "help". Sometimes I got thatha. The start of the word-building game was always good. We were all well-behaved, seated on the floor, coins and board spread out and if there was something good one of us spotted, then a separate secret exchange to ensure that the word was right, spellings correct etc. As the pressure and the points started building, the elders usually took over the 'fun game', sometimes nearly snatching the coins out of our hand, making a grab for the dictionary to strongly contest an opponent's word and sometimes stealing sly glances through other possible bonus point words while turning the pages.

Thatha, of course had to steamroller ahead - in points, in words or in the way in which he finished. As the board filled, he would get restless, usually stand up and after a point lean over the board as if an aerial view would give him some clue - some brainwave that being seated on the floor eluded. Towards the end, when it was those critical last couple of words and letters left he would pick up the unspent letter and chase around the board with his eyes, looking for that gap or that space where it could fit. I would coax quietly or make a timid suggestion if I was on his team, but more often than not he would try to shout down the "opponent's" words or moves as being illegal, muting his protest when he found that actually he hadn't much of a case, or better still, the other move had given him an advantage. 

The classic finale of the family gathering, was the best . With all these vocal cord advantages, thatha was usually ahead in the game, but if anyone else dared finish their coins first while he was still struggling with those remaining letters, he had a simple but effective finishing touch. After the usual attempts at protest that he would unveil, if he did find no use in that, he would just bend over and swoop down on some two hours of labour and jumble the whole board with one sweep of his hand. Even as we watched aghast, he would pick himself up and walk off - "I have to rush for something important, I am not playing in this game" giving us a good long view of his receding back. 

As it was thatha, we usually never said anything. The next time around, when we played Spell-o-Fun, he was back, boisterous and enthusiastic as ever. Of course, we just played along.